Feeling well and song lists

We went off shopping, and I am still feeling well. We had a second breakfast out as a treat before coming home. I spoke to Pete and Toby who is still feeling the effects of jet lag.

I did some gardening, and Mas did a few house chores. The weather is still very hot, and we sat in the garden for a while. Later we watched The Bill, and Ghost whisperer.

When I went to bed I felt compelled to list all the songs I like best in order of preference, which is odd as generally songs are not my favourite kind of music, after what seemed like ages I came up with this list, but not especially in any choice order:

Ghost Riders in the Sky, by Frankie Laine
Besome Mucho, sung by a man
Moonlight in Vermont
Canadian Sunset
La Vie en Rose
Windmills of your Mind, by Noel Harrison
Wild is the Wind, by Nina Simone
Ne me Quitte pas
When I am laid in Earth.............

I gave up at this point, not being able to think of any more, but realising that I prefer sad songs which is odd as I really like funny films. Then I had to stop myself making a film list, and eventually went to sleep!

Toby arrives and more treatment in hospital for me

Toby is due to arrive at Gatwick at 9.30 this morning from Toronto, while I am seeing the doctor in the hospital. It was decided that I should have a 20% reduction in the strength of the chemotherapy that I have to take. I went upstairs, feeling like a lamb going to the slaughter, but luckily things went smoothly and I left feeling less shaky than the last time after the session. Mas picked me up from the hospital, luckily without parking, and being fined as we were last time.
The weather had turned very hot. I spoke to Pete and Toby who had arrived without incident and avoided the predicted thunderstorms on the way. Later Mas and I watched Pie in the Sky and a Frasier before going off to bed

not living in 'interesting times'

On Saturday and Sunday I pottered about generally feeling well, got out our juicer and decided to do apple and carrot juice, and made some soup, and we did a bit of gardening and catching up with friends and family. The weather was very hot and humid, but we sat in the garden in the evenings which was pleasant.
On Monday I went down to Edgware and topped up my mobile phone, and got a bit of shopping, and later wrote some letters. Mas still has a bad back, but I was unable to make an appointment with the doctor as the phones were constantly engaged....not a very good service! Despite his back hurting so much Mas spent time clearing up our garden shed which had become so untidy it was hard to find anything.
All rather unexciting things, but it was a relief to be feeling so much better again, and cheered Mas up quite a bit.

surprise orchids and neighbour's garden

I am feeling much better than I have for a long time, and for the first time coffee tasted like coffee again, and it felt good to be alive.

We spent some time in the garden as everything seems to be growing really fast. Later found I had a long and happy email from Jana, which made me glad too.

Our neighbour invited me to his garden to look at what he has been doing with it over the last two weeks.

Colony Collapse Disorder in honey bees

I used to be a beekeeper many years ago and have always been interested in bees. Apparently the bee world is in crisis, and they are dying out worldwide; China, Argentina, Europe and America. France has lost ⅔ of it's agricultural bees, and the USA ⅓.

The name given to this is Colony Collapse Disorder and the cause is at present unknown, and there is no cure. It is speculated that there may be a variety of reasons for this such as :

1. A parasitic mite called Varroa which has become resistant to the chemicals formerly used to kill them. The mite also carries viruses which are constantly mutating, and they infect the bees.
2. Crop spraying

3.The practice of moving bees hundreds of miles to pollinate specific crops. The physical process of being moved is very stressful to bees, and it is thought possible that they are becoming undernourished as they are feeding on specific crops rather than being free to chose their own wide variety of food, so their diets may have become deficient.

Should the decline continue at its present rate it is estimated that all agricultural bees will be dead in about seven years. Although bumble bees and others are helpful in pollination, because of present farming techniques the are also in decline. It is reported that Einstein said if there were no honey bees the world would survive for about four years.

When I had bees of my own I joined a bee club, at first there were only six of us, but the numbers quickly increased. Pete and Toby would sometimes come to the informal meetings where honey cakes were served with tea, and sometimes mead. Members became very passionate about their bees; one time we met at the vicar's house and two of them were arguing about the best time to move bees from one place to another, and then began punching each other in the vicarage garden, egged on by their laughing wives, until the vicar separated them!

The local council had my phone number to call if there was a bee emergency, such as a swarm, which I would go off and collect. It was a valuable prize at the beginning of the season, either to sell or keep for honey production. It occurred to me that it would be a good idea if Pete, suitably kitted up, would collect swarms as a way of making some extra cash. One hot summer Sunday I got a call, and took Pete to watch how it was done.

It was a humiliating day, and despite the heat I was glad I was in disguise in my bee suit. The swarm was in a quiet West Hampstead cul-de -sac. All the neighbours got deck chairs out into the street to watch the fun, while they were drinking lemonade. One of these people happened to be a rather handsome and popular TV actor.

I could not catch these bees, and they kept decamping and moving to yet another garden. I spent all afternoon trying to get them, and once everyone had drifted off I at last got the queen and a few others, and had to set the box up so that the rest of the swarm would eventually follow the queen, and all go into the collecting box as it got dark. Pete took a dim view of the whole proceedings, and my idea was quietly dropped.

Pete's visit to home and hospital followed by pizza pie

On Monday I did a few essential things, and made some phone calls. I am glad as I am feeling better today. In the afternoon Pete arrived, and we had a nice time talking all afternoon and evening, and Mas made one of his tasty tamale pies.

Pete and I managed to get to the Royal Free at the right time in the morning. I did the blood test and them saw my doctor who, in view of the strong reaction I had had to the chemo, decided that I should have another week to recover before doing another course. The nurses and doctors in the outpatients are so pleasant, and there is such a good atmosphere there that it takes the sting out of the whole procedure. I had mentioned to Pete that I would really like to eat a pizza, and before long we were both looking forward to one.

We left the hospital, Pete much relieved that I had not been railroaded into taking more chemo before I was better. We ate tasty pizzas in the conservatory in Ask at Belsize Park, and then we went our separate ways home. When I got home Mas was happy that I had another week to recover. He is having a horrible time as he has backache, and a pain in his foot that seems to travel up the sciatic nerve and is finding it difficult to get out of chairs and change position. He has not the 'time' to go to the doctors to get it sorted out despite anything I say to him.

Florence called me, and we talked for about an hour, and were laughing about times we used to work together. Mas and I watched Pie in the Sky, and went to bed rather early

Mas and the Mouse

Today we ventured out and went to the pub for lunch, I was surprised how tottery I felt walking down the road, but felt better after a meal. I was pleased because the range of what I can bring myself to eat is gradually expanding. We got a small amount of shopping, but when we got back I had to rest, the pills I am taking actually make it quite hard to hold my eyes open most of the time, and my eyesight seems to be slightly out of focus.

I spoke to Pete on the phone, and managed to email Ruth before we watched The Bill on TV, and I went off to bed again.

On Sunday I felt a bit better, and actually managed to do some gardening. The field mouse is now living in our garden shed, and has eaten a hole in the bird food container; sometimes we see him in there as well. Mas was a bit concerned that there would soon be lots of them in there, and decided to tidy up the shed and give the mouse his marching orders. After this talk I was surprised and amused that Mas had instead put a dish of food for the mouse, and a container of water beside it!

Pete left, friends, family and other animals communicate.

Feeling slightly better today. Pete nervously left after breakfast, worried he may have bought a cold into the house hold, but luckily he did not get one after all which he mentioned when he called later. Diane called, and I explained what had been going on as we had missed a get together while I had been in hospital again. She was rather shocked to hear what a time it has been, and offered any kind of help that Mas or I might need, even just to talk, which was very touching.

Toby phoned too, and said he would be over at the end of next week, and would stay at Pete's so as not to add to the confusion, bur would be available whenever needed, and just to visit too. They had a really nice holiday in Argentina.

Later while resting I noticed we have a blackbird who does his usual song, but finishes his phrases with a loud cat's miaow. Thank goodness he isn't doing a car alarm which some of them do!

sickness and confusion

I became increasingly nauseous, and to add to the aggravation I put my back out, and could not stand upright, so took the correct pills and stayed in bed until the muscles stopped spasming and I could move again. My friend Pat was going to visit, but we had to put her off until I was a bit better.

Pete came up, and gave a hand with all the housework. He was so worried about me that when he left I phoned the hospital, and they admitted me again. It seems I was dehydrated and had lost all kinds of vital salts from my blood. They ran all kinds of tests to make sure I had not picked up an infection, and replaced all the things my blood was missing by drip. I felt as if I was tethered to the wall like a goat on a chain, and was relieved after four days when I was disconnected from the drip machine.

It seems it was the chemotherapy causing all the problems. I was given a huge supply of pills to take home to also keep hydrated and replace salts and vitamins also I was advised to drink Coca Cola as it has so much sugar in it that it helps in water absorption .

I came home on Tuesday the 15th. Mas had been visiting me every day, spending £6.00 a day on the parking fees, and on the last day also paid the fees and a fine of £60.00 for not parking in exactly the right spot because there were no spaces left!

Pete visited again, and he and Mas were relieved to see me looking better again, and Pete wrote up a schedule of which pills had to be taken and when as it was all very confusing. Later we had a nice relaxed evening with me going off early to bed as it is hard to keep awake with these pills I have to take.

More medications and Mex visiting for the afternoon

On Monday the 7th of July I went off to the hospital to collect some different medications as I had been feeling increasingly nauseous.

In the afternoon Mex came round as planned, and we had a really nice time catching up on all the news and talking. Mex bought me some beautiful red flowers and a turquoise , blue and lime green glass dish that picks up the exact green of the Maidenhair Fern and Hibiscus plants in the sitting room. Mas made a light lunch, and we were having such a nice time, and looking at pictures of the elderly character cat that she has recently inherited and were surprised to see how the time had sped by and Mex inadvertently missed a meeting she was going to.

Bollie the cat

Laughter, landscaping and escaping

Independence day for Mas! I bussed off again for an hour to get a few things from the shops, leaving him to answer all his emails. On returning I saw Maheena as I was walking to the house; we stopped and talked for a while, then Glen ran out to talk to us as well. We had a few minutes where we were laughing at everything we were talking about.

When I left them, my next door neighbour invited me into his garden to look at all the gnomes, and the landscape he is giving them. He certainly has been working hard, and the sunburn on his buns proves it. He is very happy with the garden which will take another week to finish.

Florence phoned, returning my call. It was nice to hear from her and catch up on all the news. She was rather shocked at mine, which was what I had tried to avoid. Later I went into the shed to get some more bird food to put in the feeder, only to find the little field mouse having dinner on some of the spilled grains, he ran over my hand to escape.

In the evening we watched some Frasiers, and a Frost before going to bed.

Minor irritations and good friends

Yesterday it was a little cooler and I managed to do lots of irritating things that had to be done, including complaining about household bills that were incorrect, and taking steps to block nuisance phone calls which will take a month to take effect. It is amazing how much time simple things take to organise. Later I went off to Edgware, by bus, as my feet have become rather painful and red due to the pills I am taking. Later Diane called while I was resting, and she arranged to come over next week which will be nice, we have not had a 'get together' for a long time.

Today Mas and I got some shopping in Stanmore and looked in at the pub there. There is a new manager now and it was immediately apparent! We decided to have lunch before going home again, and relaxed for a while.

I spoke to Pat who I have not seen for ages. It is a shame how easy it is to get taken up with the routine of daily life, not making enough time for friendship. Next year I will try to make up for this waste of time.

Birds watching on a hot day

We spent the day at home today, Mas doing some essential kitchen cupboard door repairs, and I pottered about in the garden doing battle with some Virginia Creeper which has rampaged over everything. It was the hottest day of the year today, and we spent time sitting in the garden in the shade with cool drinks. In the evening we watched some essential Pie in the Sky.

This is a special unicorn bird as it has a little horn on its' head.

This young bird kept watching me despite the noise I was making watering the plants.

Fish and chips and Stag beetles

Today I woke and felt much better, still a bit tired though. I managed to clear up the house a little, and pulled out a few weeds in the garden while Mas had to go off to a meeting.

Later we decided to have a change of scene, and went off for a fish lunch and collected some shopping. I cannot believe I feel so well today, and did not take the special anti nausea medication.

Diane called as she had been concerned at how strange I had sounded yesterday when we spoke, and was reassured that I am back to 'normal' again. She mentioned that she had found a large stag beetle in her garden which had cheered her up.

I remember when I was a child my father had some stag beetles in an old aquarium as he was doing illustrations of them for a book, and we kept them as pets for a long time. In the end there were so many of them that we decided to release them on Hampstead Heath which we sadly did, emptying them out into a patch of the woods on a dismal afternoon. Each time we passed the spot on walks we looked for them, but never saw them again.

Lucanus Servus

Nausea and narcolepsy

Thursday, Friday and Saturday passed in an increasing blur of nausea and exhaustion. Pete phoned from Guernsey telling me where he had been, who he had seen, and what he had been doing while he was there, and made me feel I was there too.

On Saturday I phoned the hospital about the nausea which had become intolerable by now, and they asked me to come in on Sunday morning and they would give me a prescription and pills to help me. Mex phoned telling her news and initiating me into some of the mysteries of Twitter.com. Tobe sent an email saying they were about to leave for their holiday in Argentina.

On Sunday morning all the tube lines were disrupted, so Mas drove me to the hospital. Luckily the roads were fairly clear of traffic. The doctor was very sympathetic and I soon left with the new medication. As advised I took ¼ of one of the pills; immediately I felt as if I had been poleaxed! I had to go straight to bed and spent most of the day asleep, and if I tried to watch television it was the same; I just slept through it! The nausea however disappeared.

Mas cut the lawns, and he said as he was emptying out the cut grass found a little mouse hidden in the dry grass at the bottom which startled him. It immediately ran under the hedge and away.

We went early to bed, and I slept as if anaesthetised all night, and woke with a sore throat so think I must have been snoring too!

Hospital foot massage and French Market in St. Albans

Yesterday I went off to hospital bright and early and had another chemo. session. As usual everyone was helpful and pleasant, and I also had a complimentary foot massage while I was having my treatment and the lady who was doing it was very interesting to talk to as well.

At the end of the afternoon I went home and Mas collected me from the station. I felt tired and was having lots of weird sensations, and after dinner and watching a Frasier I took myself off to bed early, and Mas soon came up to bed too.

Today I woke feeling much better and we decided to go off to St. Albans as usual and get shopping and to meet Tania and Robert in Sazio's for lunch. Mas bought a really comfortable pair of shoes. As it will be Robert's birthday soon he bought a bottle of wine for us to celebrate the occasion with. Afterwards we walked through a French Market which visits St. Albans now and then and looked at the different soaps and dried and preserved fruits.

Pete phoned from Guernsey; he had been doing all the usual familiar things in St. Martin's, and while he phoned was waiting for the bus to take him to Town to meet up with Poppy and Ben.

Mas went off to get a little more shopping and we had a relaxed evening.

Curry and chats, tea in the garden without gnomes

On Thursday I walked to Edgware, got a little shopping and posted letters. After lunch I did a bit more gardening and then we went off to meet Tania and Robert for a meal in Stanmore where we chatted and had a curry meal. It was a nice change of scene and company and made a welcome break.

On Friday I went back to Oxford Street and cut through Cavendish Square to the dentists for a final session, before returning home again. We had a quiet weekend; I talked to Pete for a while and for a break Mas and I watched Monk. I usually colour my hair a kind of warm mahogany brown, but decided I would use a more natural product, so in preparation I cut my hair,(as it happened rather short,) and then put the mixture on. I think I left it on too long, as it is now very dark brown, and what with the short hair it looks as if I have bought myself a smart but rather severe wig.

It became very windy on Sunday but I managed to get in some more gardening, and talked to Diane too, and Mas made a really nice dinner.

Our neighbour's garden: he has cut down the painted dead tree and put in a small group of garden gnomes and solar lights of stars and butterflies, around the edges, which rapidly change colours all the time when it is dark.

Today I thought I had better tidy things up as I will spend tomorrow in hospital again.

By chance I was in the garden putting clean water out for the birds and a big bird landed in the garden and began dragging its wing; I thought for a moment it was damaged, but after looking at me for a while it flew off, so it must have been a distraction strategy. It was carrying a mouse or small bird. I had not seen such a bird before, and looked it up in our bird book; I think it was a Kestrel.

The weather today is sunny and 20 degrees in the shade, a perfect summer's day. Margaret and John phoned and invited us to tea, so Mas and I spent several peaceful hours sitting in their lovely garden. They have turned over the major part of their back garden to growing fruit and vegetables of which they have a huge variety, and have lots of bird feeders too so we were watching them come and go while we chatted and had tea, cheese, biscuits and fruit. We left with two lettuces, some rocket and lots of fragrant parsley.

Jana's shocking exploits in Spain and visit from Monika and Oktay

This morning I showed Mas the pictures Jana had sent of her 'walking' holiday in Spain with her brother and friends. The photographs seemed of the quality that The National Geographic magazine would use, and some were absolutely stunning. Some of the pictures showed them climbing up bare rock faces, or walking along non existent ledges with precipitous views; after each of these, Mas who does not like heights, uttered an involuntary, four letter word, expletive in horror.

A well deserved meal!

I spoke to Monika briefly this morning, and then I had to go off for another treatment at the dental clinic; it is such a friendly place. I notice on the tube that there is an advertisement for a free concert in Leicester Square on June the 30th as it is Canada day here; the musicians are Canadian.

Monika, Oktay and the children called in to see Mas as they were in the neighbourhood, and he said they all looked cheerful and happy; Monika will be off to Czech for a month's holiday with the children soon.

I had a rest when I got home, and Diane called and chatted for a while. Mas made me a lovely fish dinner before we relaxed for the evening.

More dental treatment and home again.

Mas and I got up early, had breakfast quickly and he drove me off to the station. I arrived at the dentists in good time, and after four injections and my nose and chin were numb, he worked on my implant, and this was completely painless. When he finished I thanked him, and picked up his spectacles to leave with, luckily he retrieved them as soon as he saw me do it. I walked back
through Cavendish Square, and caught the tube home at Oxford Street.























Cavendish Square


















When I got home, after resting , I did a little cleaning up and Mas made dinner.

The evening light looked so nice that I had to take this picture from the kitchen window, which happens to overlook the road at the front of our house.
We watched an episode of Pie in the Sky and a Frasier. Pete phoned a bit later, and then we went to bed fairly early.

Preparing for perodontics

Saturday and Sunday were fairly uneventful. The weather was very nice and we spent some time gardening, sitting in the garden, doing housework and generally catching up. I made some emergency rock cakes to take to the dentists as I have to eat at a special time so I can take the chemo pills.

Diane phoned to sadly cancel her visit on Sunday as she felt tired, and had a hectic week. I spoke to Pete and caught up a bit with Toby which was nice. I got an email from Jana with wonderful pictures of her holiday in Spain, some of it was mountain climbing, not just walking! We watched a bit of TV, filling in with Frasiers.

Today we got up horribly early, and I got to the station at 7.30am and I bought some water to wash my pills down with later. I got to Oxford Circus in good time, despite it being rush hour on the tube, and had time to eat the cakes and take my pills sitting in the sun in Cavendish Square where others were drinking coffee.

I reached the periodontic specialists in plenty of time. The people were very nice, and I had more x-rays ( I must glow in the dark by now), and a very precise examination. I was told I must come back for treatment tomorrow, Wednesday and Friday, but the implant could be saved. :-)

I looked at the food in John Lewis' and after seeing the prices of the different breads decided when I am better I will make my own again as I used to when Pete and Toby were young. I went home the scenic way, on the bus, and then relaxed most of the day.

Taking care on Friday the 13th!

I woke in the night feeling shivery, took my temperature which was raised at 5.00am, but next morning it was normal again; I thought it was the new antibiotics. I phoned the hospital, and they told me to come to the Accident and Emergency department which I did.

I saw the same nice doctor I had seen on Tuesday, who did lots more tests and examined me again, and took more blood samples ( I began to feel like Tony Hancock in 'The Blood Donor, and imagined that lately I must have used up one armful of blood on tests ). The doctor told me that I could not have any surgery until he had confirmed my white blood cell count was not too low. As all my blood counts were good, he spoke to my caring dentist to tell him the position, and called the specialist as well, and that the dental care must be done straight away. This took a long time, but I left the hospital feeling very confident that I was really being looked after.

Got home again, and found the dental specialist had already called and made me an appointment for 9.00am Monday morning. We then relaxed and caught up with a few emails before having dinner and watching TV for a while.

Playing Carcasson and impersonator beetles

We got up and had a cheerful breakfast together, and Pete and I played a game of Carcassonne which was fun, and Pete won. We were not quite sure what to do with 'the farmers', but somehow it was a relief to find that they are placed lying down in fields. We will improve with practice.

Mas took me to the dentist again; he gave me more antibiotics and advised I see a specialist which he would arrange. I am so impressed with the care that they are showing me.

Impressive male duck with a brood patch on his chest.

Baby Moorhen

We returned home, after collecting the new medication, to find Pete had vacuumed and tidied up, which was nice. We went to Letchmore Heath to the Three Horseshoes for a pub lunch and had a cheerful meal together. I became fascinated by a strange insect which I took for a beetle as it had no visible wings, but looked like a wasp, I had never seen one of these before. It was going up the inside of the window as we left, and I tried to catch it to release it outside, but it was too high for me to reach without standing on a chair. Pete got it and we took it outside and I tried to photograph it on his hand, but he kept saying it was biting him, so the picture was out of focus, but it was funny.

Medicals, meditation and mellow moods

Yesterday I had to go for a blood test at the Royal Free, on mentioning that I was a bit breathless after walking a mile a very thorough doctor did a battery of different tests on me, an ECG, chest x-ray, blood tests and the most thorough medical that I have ever had. All the tests showed that I am really very healthy which was very reassuring. It did take all day though.

Mas for his part had his teeth polished by the hygienist, and was very impressed by her. Both of us felt a bit tired and we went to bed early.

Today we went to St. Albans, the drive was really lovely as the countryside is particularly beautiful at this time and it was a sunny day. We bought fresh fruit and vegetables and then met Tania and Robert for lunch as usual in the Thai restaurant. Robert and Tania were both a bit under the weather, but we had a really nice meal and some laughs. The owner took me aside and suggested I use meditation to help me get better, and advised singing inside without a head as a good method. This presented various pictures to my mind and I resolved to think about it later.

We drove home and had a quick rest, and I discovered that the dentist had left a message to contact him. I did, and it was arranged that I call in tomorrow and he would review my tooth.

Pete arrived as planned, we had a really nice dinner which Mas prepared and we spent a nice evening together listening to Toby's jazz compilations and talking. All of us felt tired so we went off to bed fairly early.

Cheerful meal with friends

Today was hot and sunny so we thought we would push on with the gardening while it was nice.
Diane phoned which was nice and we arranged that she would come to us for Sunday lunch.

Christiane called in the morning and we arranged to all meet up at The man in the Moon for a meal. We met as planned with Christiane, Eddie, John and Margaret. A different manager was on duty, so everything was as nice as usual. Eddie had bought a huge pile of coupons which were offering various meals at reduced rates, so confusion reigned while everyone decided what to eat. Eventually we settled down and enjoyed our meal and the conversation. Sadly I had to break it up so I could return home and take my pills at the specified time, but it had been a fun evening.

I took my pills, and we sat in the garden for a while as it had been so nice yesterday. Later we watched a couple of Frasiers; we are stretching them out by only watching two episodes a night.

Domesticity and danger

Another hot and sunny day. Mas began to clean all the stonework in the garden, and I took delight in the kitchen, and managed a gentle vacuuming with a small headed brush and very little suck which at least sucked up grass and leaves which had been walked indoors. I did a bit more pruning in the garden

Ben and Poppy called; they have moved house and are happy in their new place. Poor Ben recently fell off a ladder narrowly missing removing an eye in the process, and really frightening Poppy. He is now sporting a real shiner.

We had a peaceful day, and in my new domestic capacity I cooked dinner for a change. Later we sat in the garden admiring the flowers while sunset came, and small clouds were stained pink across an azure sky, swifts were feeding on the wing, and a large group of pigeons circled and turned above us; the sound of their flying was very attractive. It got darker, and leaves were silhouetted against the sky in a very tropical way. Gradually the west filled with a bright golden orange and we decided to go indoors. A perfect and memorable evening and we were content.

Obsessive compulsive kitchen cleaning

We had breakfast as usual, and as usual I washed the dishes and generally tidied up. I do not know if the chemo is having a strange side effect on me; I now take enormous pleasure from washing up, and each cup and dish gets polished and put away with loving care in exactly the right place, and I have to force myself to stop cleaning and polishing. This is rather strange from someone who used to agree with Scarlet O'Hara's motto of "I will worry about that tomorrow." I am wondering how far this will go, will I creep down in the night to polish up a few more cups before long?

Eventually I tore myself from the kitchen and walked down to Edgware, taking a letter to the surgery en route. It was sunny and hot, and I went to the Broadwalk to get a Radio Times as well before coming home on the bus.

Later, managing to steer clear of the kitchen I did a bit of pruning in the garden, and Mas did some gardening too. We watched a couple of Frasiers before turning into bed.

Fear and loathing of Carnations

Today after breakfast a neighbour called in to see how I was, and bought a large bunch of Carnations for me. People have been so kind to me, and have given me so many flowers but sadly now I find I associate cream carnations with being ill, and find I do not like them at all as a result. It is a shame because they are lovely flowers and when grown out doors have a lovely warm clove smell that I like. It is odd that I have this antipathy towards Carnations now because my Mother did not like them either; it was not till I was grown up that she told me my father uses to give them to her when feeling guilty about a new indiscretion, and she loathed them. Poor flowers!

The postman bought a treat for Mas: Clare had a school project and when completed was posted to Mas .She had written an 'Ode to My Grandfather' for which she got marked by the teacher 25 points out of 30. It was a lovely touching poem, and it was illustrated too. I am going to frame this for him, it is so nice he is being appreciated!

My tooth seems a lot better, and later I walked down to Edgware to collect yet another prescription, but feeling a bit tired took the bus home and had another nap. Pete called again in the afternoon and we talked. Diane sent me a cheerful e-card, and I spoke to her as well.

In the evening we watched Wycliffe, a detective story set in Cornwall and a Touch of Frost (more detectives), and then to bed.

Harmony with Classic FM and hopeful dental result

This morning Mas went downstairs to make the breakfast coffee as usual while I finished dressing. As soon as he goes downstairs he turns on the radio and listens to Classic FM to keep him company; if he does not care for a piece of music he tunes it out and just does not hear it, and it does not matter how loud or big the orchestra is that is playing the music.

I came downstairs feeling rather chipper as I had not had any drastic effects from the pills I had been taking, and proceeded to pour out the coffees. I handed Mas his coffee, and whistled a couple of bars from the music that was playing so loudly. The effect was immediate, he looked as shocked as if a cobra had risen up and bit him, and gave a visible shudder. I believe he has strange bat like hearing and some frequencies seem to shred his nerves as he claims that I whistle shrilly, and off key, which is obviously unjust. As he complains about me whistling I usually do it from a distance, but I forgot today; the look on his face made me laugh so much that he had to laugh as well.

We went off to the dentist again and I saw the hygienist who is a beautiful young girl. I realised as I had this strange phenomena of pins and needles in my mouth, and that my throat would close if she used cold water, so she scaled and polished my teeth by hand. She also said that if we were careful she thought we could save my tooth, and she proceeded to carefully inject antibiotics into the gum, and told me to use salt and special mouth rinses. She could not have taken more care, and I am very grateful for her help. I was especially thankful as I had begun to visualise myself with no hair, a front tooth missing and all I would need would be an eye patch to complete the picture!

When we got home and after lunch, Mas cut the lawns and the hedge which is a lot in one day, and I was sorry I was not able to share it as usual. I do find that I have to take a rest during the day now which is something I do not usually do.

Mas then went off to get some shopping and Pete and I talked on the phone for a long time and I caught up with some e-mails.

We watched a little TV in the evening, but we were both tired and went to bed early.

Visit to dentist and delicate gardening

After breakfast, and lots of pills we got ready and Mas took me to the dentist who took x-rays of my implanted tooth and said it had an infection and prescribed antibiotics; he thought it likely that I would loose the tooth. He was very kind and said I could phone him anytime I was worried, and I made an appointment to see the hygienist the following day.

We went off to get the antibiotics from the chemist, and Mas collected a little shopping, and we returned home. After lunch I rested for a while, before going into the garden to do some gardening; the easiest kind, removing dead heads of flowers. These roses round the window are highly scented and their perfume fills the bedroom above.

In the evening we watched The Bill, some Frasier, and I, Claudius, and by mistake we found we had stayed up very late, so went off to bed.

Kind nurses and weird sensations

Today I went back to the hospital, had a blood test, saw the specialist and began the chemotherapy.

The nurses in this section of the hospital could not be better. They explained the procedures with full eye contact and went through the list of possible side effects, were attentive and helpful in every way; the whole atmosphere was very relaxing. I mentioned that my gum had become inflamed and was advised to go to the dentist immediately before my immunity decreased.

I was connected to a drip and the process began. Thankfully it was fairly uneventful except that my arm began to feel strange so a nurse bought a mini hot bottle which relieved the sensations a bit. With this particular drug you must keep warm, and in particular not drink anything cold. I forgot and took a sip of cool water and my mouth instantly felt as if it was full of pins and needles, this was relieved instantly by a sip of hot tea. After being given lots of instructions and follow up pills to take at home, and contact numbers to call I left and met Mas who was waiting for me downstairs. I felt a bit shaky but otherwise not too bad. On the way back Mas drove to the dentists and they gave me an appointment for the next day which was a relief.

We got home, and Mas made dinner and I found myself really hungry. My arm felt as if it had been rubbed all over with stinging nettles, but I had a hot water bottle to relieve it. I cannot touch anything cool or I get pins and needles in my hands, and I have to clean my teeth using hot water which is odd.

We watched some Frasiers and went to bed a bit early. I was glad to have made a beginning as it brings the finish of the treatment closer.